The thing about the mama’s boy/daddy’s girl dance is that you can think you’re doing well growing beyond its limitations when the unique challenges that face mama’s boys and daddy’s girls sneaks up on you. That’s when the dance turns into a collision, creating unhappiness and dissatisfaction.
This morning, at the kitchen sink, I was contemplating how stuck I feel these days in the negative aspects of being a daddy’s girl when a little voice in my head said, “well, he’s got his mama’s boy thing going on too…he triggers you!”
I laughed at that and said, “My happiness as my mother’s daughter isn’t dependent on his happiness as his father’s son.” (When a mama’s boy goes to greater wholeness, he has access to his father’s sphere of influence – the opportunity to be his father’s son. When a daddy’s girl goes to greater wholeness, she has access to her mother’s sphere of influence – the opportunity to be her mother’s daughter.)
What I mean by that is by slowing down, trusting, being more receptive, allowing the feminine to be expressed through me, these things are not dependent on him doing anything or being any different. No matter how he’s doing, my tendencies predate our relationship and are an integral part of my personality. They are active with every single person in my life.
If I wait for everyone to change, for every person in my life to quit pushing my buttons, I’ll remain unhappy and dissatisfied. Because satisfaction cannot be found out there, it can only be created inside, then I can only make a difference by attending to myself.
I create the balance in my life.